Volume 48: The Delusional Diva Syndrome

Note: On yet another uneventful Saturday night, I found myself growing increasingly frustrated with the lack of social events that Philadelphia offered for the young professional crowd. The words “grown & sexy” are often used to describe the ambiance of Philadelphia nightlife locations, though most cater to the futile, culturally challenged and superficial. There are organizations that throw events with the young professional in mind, but those parties, networking functions, and spoken word events are held at best once a month-unlike the frequent access of the club scene- and are still inhabited with individuals who personify everything but the young professional crowd. Imagine being at a social networking event, exchanging business cards with a sista pursuing her Master’s in Chemistry while teaching 9th grade Science, only to have the conversation interrupted by someone who sells ecstasy pills out of the trunk of a 1992 Ford Crown Victoria and dropped out of the 9th grade. Today it seems as though any and everyone with some form of employment considers themselves a young professional. Women often think of themselves as “Divas” because they have their own worldly possessions, while men often feel as though they are the cream of the crop- simply because they’re employed, with a roof over their heads and a working automobile. A friend and fellow Cheyney alum, John Lott (who really should consider starting a blog or book of his own) had a facebook status that questioned women with a “Delusional Diva Syndrome” or D.D.S. It really made me think about those who perpetrate the identity of the young professional male and the modern day Diva. Have our standards dropped for what is considered professional? Or is our society doomed to be overpopulated with a legion of arrogant bastards who are delusional about their worth?

“When they discover the center of the universe, a lot of people will be disappointed they are not in it.”   -Bernard Bailey

         William Shakespeare once said, “Conceit, more rich in matter than in words, brags of his substance; they are but beggars who can count their worth.
No one in modern day society imposes their self-conceit more than the self proclaimed Young Professional Male-who believes he is God’s gift to women-and the sista who suffers from Delusional Diva Syndrome. Diva is the Italian word originally used to describe the woman of rare, outstanding talent. The word was used to describe the celebrated female singers in opera theatre and popular music. Today, it is one of the most overused words permeating the mainstream media since the emergence of “hater.”
         What does it mean to be delusional? In psychology, a delusion is an erroneous belief that is held in the face of evidence to the contrary; it’s a false belief or opinion. In psychiatry, it is often a symptom of mental illness. Delusions of grandeur-which is common in paranoia-is the delusion that you are much greater and more powerful and influential than you really are. Sound like anyone you may know?
The Delusional Diva often has a physical appearance that is mediocre at best, yet she finds flaws in everyone else. Oftentimes the delusional diva is a woman of average looks, who may have a physical asset that warrants the attention of men-usually a rotund ass-and gives her the delusion that the attention that she receives has anything to do with how she looks. The woman who suffers from D.S.S may also hide behind designer fashions, advanced degrees, or even membership into a sorority or social club. Some external signs are resume dropping-the act of continually talking about themselves, their accolades and accomplishments. Resume dropping-although impressive to the mediocre mind, merely shows the Educated Negro that many delusional divas seek approval and are so vain that they care about the opinions of the same individuals that they may not even care about. The delusional diva can also be a religious nut…a type of Holy Roller. She takes the I Am Holier Than Thou approach to many things and tries to recite biblical scripture to negate her own inconsistencies. At the end of the day, she’s an idiot too.

The world tolerates conceit from those who are successful, but not from anybody else.
 –John Blake
         It’s not just the females who fall into the delusion of believing that they’re greater and more influential than they are. There are plenty of men who believe that they represent the cream of the crop, simply because of their perceived status, however live a life merely dollars away from total bankruptcy. A young professional by definition is a young city or suburban resident with a well-paid professional job and an affluent lifestyle-also known as a yuppie. The young professional is cultured and well spoken. The true young professional also knows that self-conceit ultimately may lead to self- destruction. Because of that, the young professional may also have an equal level of humility to match. He doesn’t look at others with contempt, but rather attempts to motivate.
         Seems like any idiot with a job today vainly considers himself a young professional, but what is a young professional without a professional job? Can a Dominoes Pizza Delivery boy be considered a young professional? I’m sure that somewhere out there, someone will plead their case, but upon asking a variety of my female friends…the answer was a resounding “No.”
“Conceit is God’s gift to little men.”   –Bruce Barton
         What is it that makes a man perpetrate professionalism? In a word: Women. Women are attracted to status and men seek status to impress the woman. When a man doesn’t have status, cannot gain it, or is unwilling to seek it, he’ll do what comes naturally…he’ll FRONT.
We’ve all seen it. We all know the man that dons the latest fashions from Nordstrom and Saks Fifth Avenue, but makes $10 an hour. Ladies who frequent the club are more than familiar with the guy who purchases drinks and makes it rain, while the bill collectors make it thunderstorm at his residence with invoices. Every year I see more people with $50,000 cars, but can barely afford to fill them up once a week with the premium gas they require. What’s
it worth to take on a $700 car note and have to live at home in order to do so?
         To me, the title of young professional is not just in the current status that one has acquired or how much the current job pays-but it’s also about the ambition that they display. A college student that may not be employed is still taking steps in the right direction by attending school and can be considered by many a young professional. A blue-collared worker can be considered a young professional by many for making the right moves, working diligently towards his goals, and seeking to constantly evolve. It shouldn’t be something that is reserved for those who’ve attended college…trust me…I know many educated idiots who have not maximized their bachelor’s or master’s degrees.  To be honest, I’m not someone who can pass judgment on others; I’m a photographer…not a brain surgeon. I’m not saving lives ever day or curing any terminal diseases. I’m just a man with a laptop and an opinion. (smiles) Throw in a bunch of people who enjoy reading what goes through my mind and agree with most of it, and you have The Random Thoughts Of Ronald Gray. In a perfect world, we’d all be young professionals; responsible, culturally aware people who work for what we have and seek greatness in our respective fields. But that’s just wishful thinking. In reality, we are a flawed but interesting society. A society where many of us notice the inconsistencies, but few are willing to address how it makes them feel. So allow me to address what gets on my nerves:

Delusional People want credit for things that the true independent, ambitious people simply do…and they do it without expecting praise or contempt. A Delusional Diva meets a man and says, “I don’t need no man. I got my own house, my own car, and pay my own bills.” Ladies…we don’t care…trust me…
(By the way) Why do women with no substance-however with fat asses-believe that they are so great?!? Don’t you know that the attention you receive is 100% carnal? Men stare at ass all day and that’s why they like you. You keep staring at asses all day…even a baboon’s ass…some perverted thoughts are bound to creep in! (laughing) but getting back to my point….
A Man who handles his business waits to be asked about his personal achievements and possessions. There’s an aura about him that tells you he has his shit together-there’s no need to brag or boast. It’s always strange how men who flaunt their money despise women who like them only for their money.
What some don’t realize is it’s expected of American citizens to have their own property, transportation and job. It’s nice to know that people are doing well for themselves, however it’s not necessary to boast of personal possessions. Instead, be proud of how many lives you’ve touched and people you’ve inspired to do the same.
         The Delusional Man says, “I take care of all of my kids”, however that is expected of all fathers. The Delusional Man believes that he is special because he’s never been arrested and hasn’t been to jail. The delusional man brags of never having to sell drugs; as if having avoided the preferred method of employment of the low-class citizen is an insurmountable task. Ugghhh…
Ok…time to go back to work…stay tuned, guys…

“There are some people who live in a dream world, and there are some who face reality: and then there are some who turn one into the other.”  -Douglas H. Everett

Was there anyone that I forgot?

…These Are The Random Thoughts Of Ronald Gray…
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